Longtime east-end resident Nick Brooks is writing his way through a tough time.
Brooks, who has lived in the Oakvale area near Greenwood and Danforth avenues with his wife Kathryn for 22 years, is taking an open approach to the terminal battle his wife is facing with cancer by posting his thoughts and experiences on The Beaches and I am a Leslievillan! Facebook groups as well as on his personal page.
He also recently set up a dedicated page for his posts at Kathryn’s Story, which he describes as a "log of what happens to Kathryn as she deals with her incurable cancer as seen by another. Rather than being medical, is it written with a wry sense of humour and love for a brave woman who doesn’t complain but carries on her life as if nothing was going wrong. Her best attribute, she still makes others laugh and feel better in themselves."
On May 13, Kathryn learned she had Stage 4 endrometrial metastatic cancer after visiting the doctor when she noticed workouts weren’t achieving her desired result of a flatter stomach.
"I had joined a fitness club to get healthy and fit but my stomach wasn’t going down," she said during a recent interview.
In June, she began her first round of chemotherapy after surgery was deemed not a viable option as the cancer has spread to her liver and lungs.
Kathryn’s seventh and final round of treatment concluded at the end of October.
She’s now part of a special drug study exploring the effectiveness of combining medications to mitigate the spread of the disease.
"It’s a way I can give back," she said.
"This study will benefit others down the line."
Despite her ordeal, Kathryn is still working full time for the provincial government as a treasurer for two charity campaigns.
About five weeks after learning of his wife’s cancer diagnosis, Nick started posting his thoughts and experiences about the different aspects of Kathryn’s battle on social media. His posts are often written as a love note to his wife and are usually in the third person.
"I was angry because I thought it was unfair," he said during a recent interview at his home when discussing what prompted him to post.
"I never thought I’d be the widower. If anyone should have got cancer, it should have been me," said Brooks, who is 12 years older than his wife.
"(The posts) are very much a catharsis."
Some of Nick’s musings talk about the unconditional love he has for his wife and how he cherishes the life they once enjoyed and the new life they’re now sharing together.
Others explore Kathryn’s amazing inner strength and her ability to remain positive during such a trying time, while some give thanks to caregivers and the many people who have selflessly helped the couple in myriad ways since Kathryn’s cancer diagnosis.
"It’s incredible. We have no idea who is going to turn up on the doorstep," said Kathryn, adding she feels fortunate she hasn’t had too many negative side effects from her chemo aside from fatigue and foot pain.
Some of Nick‘s posts talk about navigating the complicated and often-times inefficient medical system and the various appointments and treatments his wife endures with a smile.
In one of his more lighthearted posts, Nick – AKA The Brownie Man – wrote about his newfound brownie-making abilities and the wonderful outcome it’s had on his wife’s excellent treatment at Princess Margaret Hospital’s cancer unit.
His latest post was written Nov. 29 after dinner.
"The guests have departed. You laughed, you told funny stories, you made them happy. You went to bed. I kissed you goodnight. Standing on the stoop I saw the moon. The sky was that dark liquid blue. Not a cloud in sight. It was a lover’s moon. I listened to some music to calm my thoughts. I watched you from the bedroom door. The moon cast shadows that movies are made of. So calm, so beautiful, so peaceful. I love you Kathryn; truly, madly, deeply. Please don’t go; ever."
"(The posts) have sort of grown into almost a Kathryn fan club, in some ways," he said.
"The stuff I write is inspiring for a lot of people, but it all comes from Kathryn. … It’s a very interesting thing that has happened out of being pissed off."
It’s Kathryn’s wish that she spend her final days at home and that a memorial service be held in her honour in the nearby Oakvale Green Community Garden, which she and Nick helped create 15 years ago.
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